{"id":27575,"date":"2018-04-12T11:20:45","date_gmt":"2018-04-12T16:20:45","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/law.marquette.edu\/facultyblog\/?p=27575"},"modified":"2018-04-12T11:20:45","modified_gmt":"2018-04-12T16:20:45","slug":"overheard-outside-eckstein-hall","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/law.marquette.edu\/facultyblog\/2018\/04\/overheard-outside-eckstein-hall\/","title":{"rendered":"Overheard Outside Eckstein Hall"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a>The following conversation was overheard this morning outside of the entrance to the parking structure in Eckstein Hall:<\/em><\/p>\n

Parking Attendant:\u00a0 I’m sorry, but you will have to back up your car.\u00a0 The parking structure is full.<\/p>\n

Faculty Member:\u00a0 I can see past the gate.\u00a0 There are plenty of empty spots.<\/p>\n

Parking Attendant:\u00a0 Those spots are reserved for faculty and students only.<\/p>\n

Faculty Member:\u00a0 But I have been on the faculty for 26 years.<\/p>\n

Parking Attendant:\u00a0 My apologies.\u00a0 I didn’t recognize you.\u00a0 However, those spots are reserved for today’s On the Issues with Mike Gousha.\u00a0 He is interviewing the author of the book “Trump Bad: How to Sell Your Book By Using Trump’s Name in the Title.”<\/p>\n

Faculty Member:\u00a0 I happen to know that that event is tomorrow.<\/p>\n

Parking Attendant:\u00a0 My mistake.\u00a0 Today those spots are reserved for people attending Charles Franklin’s press conference.\u00a0 He has\u00a0new poll results: “Public Support for Cheese Curds Reaches Record Low in Wisconsin.”<\/p>\n

Faculty Member:\u00a0 I think that you made that up.<\/p>\n

Parking Attendant:\u00a0 I did.\u00a0 I’m sorry.\u00a0 I don’t know why I did that.\u00a0 But the parking structure is closed today to accommodate the attendees of the National Sports Law Institute conference: “Milwaukee Brewers Pitching: Criminally Bad or a Crime Against Humanity?”<\/p>\n

Faculty Member:\u00a0 Look, do you actually have any parking spaces in this building.\u00a0 I’ve never actually gotten inside of the parking structure.<\/p>\n

Parking Attendant:\u00a0 Of course we have parking.\u00a0 We have over 150 parking spots conveniently located on two levels inside of the law school building.<\/p>\n

Faculty Member:\u00a0 May I please park inside and see for myself?<\/p>\n

Parking Attendant:\u00a0 No.\u00a0 I’m sorry.\u00a0 Normally I would let you, but all of the parking spots are on vacation this week.\u00a0 Please come back next week.<\/p>\n

Faculty Member:\u00a0 That doesn’t even make sense.<\/p>\n

Parking Attendant:\u00a0 You’re right.\u00a0 I shouldn’t have said that.\u00a0 But the parking structure is closed today for private events.\u00a0 The Meyerowitz Bar Mitzvah has reserved level one and the Henderson-Martinez Wedding has reserved level two.<\/p>\n

Faculty Member:\u00a0 There really isn’t any parking available in this building, is there?<\/p>\n

Parking Attendant:\u00a0 What?\u00a0 Of course there is.\u00a0 We have plenty of parking spots.\u00a0 Yes. . . \u00a0 No.\u00a0 No we don’t.\u00a0 There is actually\u00a0no parking at all.\u00a0 You caught me.\u00a0 There never has been any parking in this building.\u00a0 It’s all an elaborate charade.\u00a0 I am so sorry for wasting your time.<\/p>\n

Faculty Member:\u00a0 That explains everything.\u00a0 Thank you for being honest with me.\u00a0 Somehow, giving up the hope of one day finding a parking spot in the building is oddly comforting.\u00a0 I feel better now.\u00a0 Thank you and have a great day.<\/p>\n

Backs car out and pulls away.<\/em><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

The following conversation was overheard this morning outside of the entrance to the parking structure in Eckstein Hall: Parking Attendant:\u00a0 I’m sorry, but you will have to back up your car.\u00a0 The parking structure is full. Faculty Member:\u00a0 I can see past the gate.\u00a0 There are plenty of empty spots. Parking Attendant:\u00a0 Those spots are […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":16,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"ocean_post_layout":"","ocean_both_sidebars_style":"","ocean_both_sidebars_content_width":0,"ocean_both_sidebars_sidebars_width":0,"ocean_sidebar":"","ocean_second_sidebar":"","ocean_disable_margins":"enable","ocean_add_body_class":"","ocean_shortcode_before_top_bar":"","ocean_shortcode_after_top_bar":"","ocean_shortcode_before_header":"","ocean_shortcode_after_header":"","ocean_has_shortcode":"","ocean_shortcode_after_title":"","ocean_shortcode_before_footer_widgets":"","ocean_shortcode_after_footer_widgets":"","ocean_shortcode_before_footer_bottom":"","ocean_shortcode_after_footer_bottom":"","ocean_display_top_bar":"default","ocean_display_header":"default","ocean_header_style":"","ocean_center_header_left_menu":"","ocean_custom_header_template":"","ocean_custom_logo":0,"ocean_custom_retina_logo":0,"ocean_custom_logo_max_width":0,"ocean_custom_logo_tablet_max_width":0,"ocean_custom_logo_mobile_max_width":0,"ocean_custom_logo_max_height":0,"ocean_custom_logo_tablet_max_height":0,"ocean_custom_logo_mobile_max_height":0,"ocean_header_custom_menu":"","ocean_menu_typo_font_family":"","ocean_menu_typo_font_subset":"","ocean_menu_typo_font_size":0,"ocean_menu_typo_font_size_tablet":0,"ocean_menu_typo_font_size_mobile":0,"ocean_menu_typo_font_size_unit":"px","ocean_menu_typo_font_weight":"","ocean_menu_typo_font_weight_tablet":"","ocean_menu_typo_font_weight_mobile":"","ocean_menu_typo_transform":"","ocean_menu_typo_transform_tablet":"","ocean_menu_typo_transform_mobile":"","ocean_menu_typo_line_height":0,"ocean_menu_typo_line_height_tablet":0,"ocean_menu_typo_line_height_mobile":0,"ocean_menu_typo_line_height_unit":"","ocean_menu_typo_spacing":0,"ocean_menu_typo_spacing_tablet":0,"ocean_menu_typo_spacing_mobile":0,"ocean_menu_typo_spacing_unit":"","ocean_menu_link_color":"","ocean_menu_link_color_hover":"","ocean_menu_link_color_active":"","ocean_menu_link_background":"","ocean_menu_link_hover_background":"","ocean_menu_link_active_background":"","ocean_menu_social_links_bg":"","ocean_menu_social_hover_links_bg":"","ocean_menu_social_links_color":"","ocean_menu_social_hover_links_color":"","ocean_disable_title":"default","ocean_disable_heading":"default","ocean_post_title":"","ocean_post_subheading":"","ocean_post_title_style":"","ocean_post_title_background_color":"","ocean_post_title_background":0,"ocean_post_title_bg_image_position":"","ocean_post_title_bg_image_attachment":"","ocean_post_title_bg_image_repeat":"","ocean_post_title_bg_image_size":"","ocean_post_title_height":0,"ocean_post_title_bg_overlay":0.5,"ocean_post_title_bg_overlay_color":"","ocean_disable_breadcrumbs":"default","ocean_breadcrumbs_color":"","ocean_breadcrumbs_separator_color":"","ocean_breadcrumbs_links_color":"","ocean_breadcrumbs_links_hover_color":"","ocean_display_footer_widgets":"default","ocean_display_footer_bottom":"default","ocean_custom_footer_template":"","ocean_post_oembed":"","ocean_post_self_hosted_media":"","ocean_post_video_embed":"","ocean_link_format":"","ocean_link_format_target":"self","ocean_quote_format":"","ocean_quote_format_link":"post","ocean_gallery_link_images":"on","ocean_gallery_id":[],"footnotes":""},"categories":[48,122,1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-27575","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-marquette-law-school","category-public","category-uncategorized","entry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/law.marquette.edu\/facultyblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/27575","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/law.marquette.edu\/facultyblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/law.marquette.edu\/facultyblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/law.marquette.edu\/facultyblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/16"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/law.marquette.edu\/facultyblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=27575"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/law.marquette.edu\/facultyblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/27575\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":27578,"href":"https:\/\/law.marquette.edu\/facultyblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/27575\/revisions\/27578"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/law.marquette.edu\/facultyblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=27575"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/law.marquette.edu\/facultyblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=27575"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/law.marquette.edu\/facultyblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=27575"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}