The Challenges of Being a Bad Lawyer

I know this is technically a blog, but, if it were some other social media platform, that right there, my friends, would be “click bait.”  What?? This guest blogger is going to talk about how difficult it is to be a lousy attorney?  But, no, I don’t mean bad lawyer in the sense of legal incompetency or shaky professional ethics; I mean it in terms of being the bad-guy lawyer, the bearer of the bad news, the lawyer whose job it is to tell the client that he or she is not getting a settlement or can’t win the case or …any number of other unhappy communications.

It turns out that I am conflict averse.  That this was news to me was pretty lame because I chose – at age 49! – to go into litigation after graduating law school. In fact, I chose to join the products liability defense litigation practice group when I joined a Milwaukee firm the September after graduation.  For some reason, I imagined that being a litigator would suit my personality, which, as my husband will confirm, likes to win arguments.  But it turns out I didn’t have a very good sense what litigation entailed: rather than using persuasive argument to prevail on some esoteric, high-minded point, litigation is really more like a bare-knuckled battle royale.  For me anyway, there was just too much…conflict.  And, I was too old for it.  It was exhausting.

When I changed course in my legal career and became general counsel for a national insurance trade association, I thought I’d left my conflict days behind me.  But, another epiphany here (and, yes, I really am getting to be too old for these), there is “conflict” even in a legal profession that is primarily transactional. 

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“Work-Mom” Balance

A young child sits on the floor looking at a copy of the Marquette Lawyer magazine.My husband Brad and I are proud parents of a 20-month-old daughter, Lucille.  Having to balance being a mom and a litigator at a large firm is probably the most challenging thing I’ve ever done.  But it’s also an accomplishment of which I am very proud, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.  I don’t pretend to be an expert, and I still have a lot to learn.  But based on the past 20 months, here are some tips that I’ve acquired to support a “work-mom” balance:

It takes a village.  I won’t sugarcoat this:  I’d have to quit my job if it weren’t for my husband and my mom.  My husband works predictable, regular hours and, with rare exception, does not have to work at night or on the weekends.  He is an extremely present dad, is helpful at home, and is very supportive and understanding of my job.  My mom lives 30 miles away and is our go-to babysitter, with little to no notice, particularly when Lucy is sick and has to stay home from daycare.  She watched Lucy twice per week when she was an infant and is the most dependable person in our lives.

Invest in superior daycare, whatever that means for you and your family.  For us, it means that Lucy attends a daycare in downtown Madison, only two blocks away from both my and my husband’s offices. 

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Aren’t Lawyers Always Supposed To Be Stressed?

Google the words “lawyer” and “stress” or “anxiety” and you’ll see hundreds of comics about lawyers dealing with stress. Most of the comics are pretty funny and yet somewhat sad because they are also all pretty true to real life. Just last month the National Task Force on Lawyer Well-Being released a report entitled “The Path to Lawyer Well-Being: Practical Recommendations for Positive Change.” The report is intended to bring more pointed awareness to the mental health issues many lawyers face and to also provide recommendations to instill greater well-being in the profession as a whole.

The report is 73 pages in total, which appears to create a daunting read for lawyers and law students, already over-burdened and stressed out. But it is worth the time to read through it. As the report points out, in a study released in 2016 by the ABA Commission on Lawyer Assistance Programs and the Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation, out of nearly 13,000 practicing lawyers who participated in the survey, 28% struggled with some level of depression, 19 percent struggled with some level of anxiety, and 23 percent struggled with some level of stress. In Wisconsin, there were approximately 15,550 active lawyers in 2017.

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